Everyone is worried about the H1N1 virus (at least the bureaucrats in Washington who like to make mountains out of mole hills). What the health care blowhards are not noticing is an epidemic quietly spreading across the nation. It is Obamnia: a pyschological disorder whose common traits are "difficulty watching, noticing, or even caring about an Obama public speech or appearance".

Obamnia is classified into three general categories, based on the duration of the problem.

> Symptoms lasting less than one week are classified as transient Obamnia.

> Symptoms lasting one to three weeks are classified as short-term Obamnia.

> Symptoms lasting more than three weeks are classified as chronic Obamnia.

Most of the people who suffer from Obamnia are conservatives. Transient Obamnia is very rare because it usually takes more than one week to get sick of hearing the President's speeches over and over again.

Short Term and Chronic Obamnia can be cured by turning off the television as soon as you see an Obama sighting. Also, not watching CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS and NBC are also helpful. Other helpful cures include watching 3 Stooges episodes (starring Pelosi, Reid and Frank) on C-Span or Abbott and Costello's famous "Who's on FIrst" comedy routine. 

I find the best cure when I stumble on an Obama speech and can't find the TV clicker is a nice bourbon on the rocks (Woodford Reserve please). It always eases the pain.

Because Obamnia afflicts mostly conservatives, it has not been recognized by the liberal medical establishment in Washington. It is considered a symptom, not a stand-alone disease and is therefore, not covered by any health care plans.

Do you suffer from CHRONIC OBAMNIA?



"Bill -- this guy never shuts up!"