The CEO's of The Shrinking Three, once known as the Big Three, GM, Ford and Chrysler, drove to Washington last week in cars that nobody wants to own. Their mission? To grovel before Congress and the Senate for about $34 billion in loans, $9 billion more than the request was a month ago.

The sight of these three men being subjected to questions by two of the biggest blowards on the Beltway, Congressman Barney Blather Frank and Senator Chris Coxcomb Dodd was sickening. I wouldn't trust these two clowns with overseeing my kids' lemonade stand. One by one, other congressman and senators lectured these overpaid CEO's about how to run their companies. At least these three CEO's admit their companies are on the verge of bankruptcy. Frank and Dodd probably can't balance their own checkbooks. They certainly inspire zero confidence in running or overseeing anything in DC.

Furthermore, Dodd had the audacity to suggest the CEO of GM, Richard Wagoner should "move on" as a condition for federal aid. He made this comment on CBS "Face the Nation" this morning. No, Mr. Dodd, it is time for YOU to move on after your disgraceful (lack of) oversight over Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. Look in the mirror once in a while if you want to know who is one of the biggest culprits in this financial meltdown.

Oh, that other genius in the House, Speaker Nancy Pelosi said in a statement on Friday that all funding for a car bailout would be"tightly targeted with vigorous supervision and guaranteed taxpayer protection". Please, no more guarantees from these liberal losers.

Let's face it, the three car companies are in deep trouble. Even Tiger Woods gave back his Buick to GM.They have lost market share over the years to where it is now less than 50% of the domestic market. For years they were arrogant and made lousy cars. I know - I drove enough of them until I finally got sick of the repair expenses and the poor resale value. I now own two Toyotas--they drive like a dream, look nice and hardly ever need "fixin".

These companies face the same problem as the housing market --too many cars chasing  too few customers at the depths of a severe recession. The consumer is scared to death to spend more than $10.00 on anything, unless it is for food or water. They have given up on Starbucks coffee, and foresaken the occasional night out at the local pizza joint. The vast majority of Americans are not going to shell out $20 to $40 K for a car they might have to drive to the unemployment office.

Why hasn't  John Snow's Cerberus, which owns 80% of Chrysler, called up some of his buddies on Wall Street for a capital infusion? Between Dick Fuld, Robert Rubin, and a few of the other geniuses on Wall Street, there should be a few billion laying around just waiting for a great  opportunity to invest in poorly run, bankrupt companies that make cars few people want to drive.

If the Blowhards are going to loan The Shrinking Three the money, which will never be repaid, at the very least they should insist on the following:

1. New executive management and new boards. Bring back the ancient Lee Iacocca if you have to and how about Jack Welch?

2. They should be told there is no more money after this bailout.  If they have to, bankruptcy and reorganization will be the only option left for them.

3.  The UAW has to wake up and smell the dead roses. The party is over. Get competitive with your wages and benefits, like the rest of the car industry, or face the consequences. The public, which is getting laid off left and right,  has very little sympathy for your "plight". It took you 50 years to dig the hole you are in. You now have about three months to change or the quicksand at the bottom will swallow you up.

4. Sell the existing car inventory at true cost plus 5%. It is time to RAISE CASH. There are hundreds of thousands of cars that must be sold at any cost. The 5% can go to the dealers, who are all sitting around listening to the crickets in their show rooms.

5. Give a Cadillac Escalade to the Connecticut Coxcomb to get the loan. He can park it in the driveway of his VIP subsidized sub-prime loan home.

6. Make the CEO's listen every day to DVD's of Barney Blather Frank lecturing to them about fiscal responsibilty. Also include his diatribes about Fannie and Freddie so they can be thankful they have Mr. Frank overseeing their companies.

Congress will probably pass some sort of temporary funding which will buy some time for these three companies. But, it is only going to make the death slower and probably more painful. Do not ask me or the 43 thousand workers who were laid off last week to feel sorry for the United Auto Workers. They are overpaid for what they do. The times have changed. Either change with them or join the ranks of the unemployed. The executives of these three companies can always get jobs on Wall Street selling car company junk bonds.